Yesterday I started my second period since having Sufjan. The first was kind of a fluke. It was really light and only lasted a couple days. This one seems normal though so far, if a few days late.
I’m having a rough time of it hormonally though.
I’ve been really anxious. Bordering on panic attacks since yesterday. And queasy. I feel like I can’t eat anything or I’ll puke it up. Which makes the anxiety worse since vomit is really my main trigger for panic attacks.
And someone who has been around my family is now sick with a stomach bug so I am already low-level panicking about that spreading to my house.
I’m just having a rough time.
I know it probably sounds silly to someone who doesn’t have ptsd, which makes me feel worse. Like, why can’t I just get over it? Just relax. If we get sick then we get sick and we’ll get better.
I’ll be glad when I’m off my period again.
It’s the full moon party tonight (though the full moon was last night I think) and, while I want to have fun, it’s causing me a lot of anxiety too. I really want to have fun. I’m going to try my absolute best.